Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Welcome Cambria Mae

She's here! It's not really news so much any more considering she is twelve days old now, but my goodness she is really here! It's still hard to believe that after nine long months I am now holding my baby girl who was once the size of a pea.

Cambria was born just 4 minutes after her due date at 12:04 am on July 20th. She weighed in at 7 lbs. 10 oz. and was 19 inches long.

The week of her arrival was certainly a fun week. I had taken my maternity leave at the beginning of the week, so I was busying myself with a list of household tasks to take my mind off the excitement of her arrival. I made a giant list of to-do's and I probably got through about half of them...maybe.

We had our false alarm on Monday, the 16th, where we went into the hospital with what I can only understand now as Braxton Hicks or some form of mild contractions. I kept finding it quite frustrating hearing the same thing over and over...when you have a contraction YOU'LL KNOW. It's similar to when you're single and married people always say...when you find the right one for you...YOU'LL KNOW. It's irritating being on the unknowing side, especially with the knowers frolicking their irritating knowingness in front of you. But, alas, they're right. Now that I'm a knower about such things as contractions and labor, I KNOW. Oh man, there's nothing like them. I feel so silly about how on Monday I thought that perhaps this could be it. Hah, what a fool. A fool! It reminds me of Phoebe (from Friends) when she has one contraction and then looks down and says, "Oh, I was hoping that was it." Yeah, there's a reason why the pain scale for women is measured by zero being no pain and 10 being the worst pain of your life (a.k.a. labor).

I had my first contraction at 3pm on Thursday and I was at home chilling with my daughter, Lamaya. I remember thinking that this is probably the start of things, but who knows how long this pre-labor period will last. I had heard it could be endless hours of laboring at home before you need to head to the hospital. That was the plan, anyhow. So, I didn't jump when I had my first contraction. After having my second and third contraction in less than an hour, I decided it might be a good idea to get backup to care for Lamaya since that wasn't a possibility while bearing down on the side of the couch in pain. My mom came to my rescue and she didn't have to do much else but look at me to know... this was the real deal. No dress rehearsal this time. I texted Tim alerting him to my condition and said that there was no need to come home since the contractions were still 20 minutes apart. I had to call him back just 30 minutes later and say, "Hun, you need to come home now. They are about 8 minutes apart and getting closer and closer each time. I think we need to go to the hospital like...now." Of course he came right on home.

After arriving at the hospital, they sent us walking for an hour. Longest hour of my life. Contractions were coming at me like waves--one right on the heels of the last. After checking back in with my midwife it was clear I was in active labor and it was time to get us into a room.

I was so excited and anxious to get into the water birthing tub. Somehow I knew the moment I got in the tub the release of the weight of what seemed to be the entire world on my shoulders would be lifted. It took a little over an hour to make it to the room due to so many contractions coming and the need to stop and hold on to the hand rails. Once we made it to the room, I had to wait just outside while they finished preparing the tub and there are a few memories etched in my memory. First, I remember my toenail polish matching my cushy flip flops. I remember when my mom arrived. I remember my midwife being very calming and helping me release each contraction as it passed. I remember a great boom of thunder from the thunderstorm going on outside. And I remember the song "How Great Thou Art" performed by Chris Thile playing and everything inside me acknowledging that God is great and He is kind and most importantly He was going to be with me through every breath. I remember that being the moment where I realized this would be the hardest thing, at least physically, that I would ever go through and that with His strength I could do it. It was a peace that washed over me.

The music came from our room where Tim had set up the music right away. Everything else we brought with us could wait, but the music was needed right away. That is my husband knowing his wife well. :)

Laboring was difficult, to say the least. Laboring in the tub was magnificent. I cannot imagine laboring in a bed. Yes, I was able to get through the entire 9 hours (yes, I know this is a short amount of time to labor, praise Jesus!) without any medication. I wasn't out to prove anything. I simply knew that my body was designed to bring a child into the world and I trusted it.

Ummm was it all magic and fairy tales? No. It was the worst imaginable pain and there were plenty of times I told Tim that I couldn't do it. But I got through, we all did. There are really two moments that I'll never forget during the time of pushing. The first was turning to Tim and saying that I couldn't do it. I couldn't go on. My midwife said, "Ashley, I want you to reach down and feel her head." Once I did that, there was nothing I couldn't do. A serious bonfire was lit under me and I gave it everything I had and everything I didn't have to get her here. The second was once the majority of Cambria was delivered, my midwife asked me to reach down and pull her up to my chest. It was an unreal moment. I was witnessing and experiencing life from my own body being brought to my heart. It was a breathtaking moment.

So, for anyone considering a water birth, I can't help but give my wholehearted approval and recommendation. It was fantastic. The warmth relaxed me, the water allowed me to just focus on my breathing and nothing else. I would absolutely do it again.

Now, there are a few things I'd like to get off my chest about labor and delivery. I was never told about the after pain. I expected that once the placenta delivered I'd be in my blissful state of my baby is here and life is good and now I can rest.

Ummm no. I remained in a significant amount of pain afterwards. Thankfully there was no tearing (due largely in-part to the water keeping me relaxed), but there was still plenty of pain. No one told me about this. The pain continued on, with contractions included, for several hours afterwards. Since I was all-natural, I think they assumed I was part-hippie, which meant I didn't want any big-time drugs. I finally all but took the collar of my nurse and said ibuprofen ain't gonna cut it sweetheart. Give me the narcotics. :) That, at least, took off the edge.

I'd also like to point out that breastfeeding is very difficult and anybody who tells you it shouldn't hurt or won't hurt is wrong. It hurts, so just accept it. However, there is magical product that has spared me endless amounts of pain... it's called a nipple shield. Probably a little TMI for you all, but trust me ladies... it's a God-send.

Well, all I can say to wrap this up is... I am in love with my little Cambria. She is my little sweet pea and I just adore her. Having two beautiful daughters that I adore and love so much is just the most tremendous blessing I could have asked for. I'm so thankful for my family and all that God has blessed us with in just 9 short months. Zero to two. What an amazing thing.

It's a miracle I was able to write this blog in one sitting! Lamaya is hanging with grandpa and Cambria is zonked next to me. Time to feed everybody, so I better go! Thanks for following our journey. Now onto blogging about straight-up mommyhood. Oh me, oh my. The next leg of this journey is sure to be a doozie!


Love, AA