Confessions of Ashley de Ainley

I just finished reading "Confessions of Catherine de Medici" by C.W. Gortner and I felt that perhaps I, too, would jot down a few confessions of my own.

Confession #1: I hate sharing milk

It's not that I hate sharing milk in general, it's that I find it disgusting to share a glass of milk. This has been something I've struggled with most of my life. I would rather abandon a full glass of milk than suffer the grotesque milk residue left by my milk-sharing companion.

Confession #2: I hate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches

It's like America's past time, and still I don't care for it. It's the classic quick and easy lunch for picnics, hikes, walks and low food budgets, but still I don't budge on my stance.

When I was four years old, my brother and I had two pet lizards. My mother didn't care much for them since she wasn't a fan of purchasing crickets for their tasty delight. We would always go to the local pet store and pick up a Chinese to-go food box filled with crickets.

One afternoon, after being picked up from school, my dad inquired about whether I had finished my lunch. I said I had, though I still hid my uneaten PB&J sandwich in my lunch pail. As soon as I got home, I devised a plan to offer to throw away the emptied cricket box and fill it's empty remains with my discarded sandwich. It was genious. Worked like a charm until I was hungry well before dinnertime without a solid explanation. I swear I wasn't that devious a child, this just happens to be a memory that has stuck with me.

Confession #3: I am long-winded

I'm not sure anything needs to be said about this. Though, in lieu of the subject, I must elaborate. Oh, wait, nevermind.


Confession #4: I am a sucker for traveling salesmen

Yes, it's true. I had no idea I had this weakness until I became a homeowner. On a sunny Saturday afternoon a vacuum traveling salesman stopped in to showcase a Kirby vacuum system. I had no interest and thought it was completely unreasonable the price they were asking. Yet, somehow after he cleaned our entire home with this out-of-this-world vacuum, I found myself nodding my head signing the dotted line. Now, let's just say that we spent more on that vacuum than I did on my wedding gown. I know. Insane. And this wasn't my only moment of weakness. You would think I would have learned after nearly signing away my first born for a machine. Yes, there have been other unfortunately purchases over the years. It's like something happens, I become hypnotized and incapable to say no. So, if this is your profession, don't be offended if we never have you over for dinner. It's my husband protecting me from doing something I'll regret.

Confession #5: I have been ignoring my husband while I wrote this

So, I should probably get to enjoying what is left of this beautiful September Saturday.


Ciao!